We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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