where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Randomize
