Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Moan for me like Helen Keller
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Randomize
