Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
