Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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