"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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