Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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