Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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