CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
