'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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