I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
