that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
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