My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
