i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
