So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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