yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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