Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
