I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
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