oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
