Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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