she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
