its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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