Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
You are the jesus of drinking
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
