R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
3 2 1 whiskey
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
