I got chris browned last night
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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