You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
