Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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