her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
