careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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