also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
