i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
