White coat. Heels.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
