I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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