I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
