her vagine was all disorganized.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Randomize
