I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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