you guys were way drunker than both of me
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
