I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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