I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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