Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Randomize
