Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
