elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
