Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
