Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
