I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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