so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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