The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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