What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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