Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
