seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
