I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
